Sunday, October 7, 2007

No to Children

A simple question with a lot of thought put into it:

People who decide not to have children (even though they can,) are they thinking about their future or running away from their past?


Anonymous said...

to the one I know , he doesn't want repeat his past : (

Aysha said...

Ow :"|

aga said...

Both. Ironically, with children comes a different appreciation of one's past and one's place, then and in the future.

Aysha said...

Very true...

Trevely said...

I love children, I really do.. but if I get married I'd want to stay child-free for at least three years. I've seen too many marriages being held together by the thin strings of "there are children involved"--that's just me.
Now if others never want to have children, fine by me.. god knows the world has an over-population problem.

Anyway, the real reason I made my way to your blog is that I just read your comment from last week and it absolutely made my day. I just wanted to tell you I really really appreciate it. It's amazing to find that an absolute stranger can put my exact thoughts into words even better than I can.
I'll update you on the unacceptable boy ;)

manutdfanatic said...

Depending on the individual involved; it could be either.

Perhaps if someone was an absolute pest who reduced his or her parents to tears in his or her childhood, they choose not to have children because they're afraid of "history repeating itself"; that is, they choose to run away from their "past".

They might be thinking about their "future" in cases where they've seen other children figuratively "mutilate" their poor haggard parents.

Highly introspective question; I must say, I enjoyed giving it a thought. :)

Aysha said...

Dear trev,
Thank you for coming by, I hope to get to meet you one day, but that is not major. Often when faced by saddening or upsetting things in life, it gives us great relief that somewhere in this chaotic or even silenced world another person is facing what we are facing. The sense of the shared experience is a reason for us to be stronger and keep on "believing".
As for children, loving them and having them are two different emotions :D Whether it is cultural, or bilogical, children seem to be like a delayed assignment that you have to get done, or a beep will keep haunting you until you do. Well, and when you're done a new kind of beep enters your life, and new assignments ^_^

Aysha said...

Very well thought! I enjoyed reading your interpretation of the question, and the points you added onto what I had in mind initially.

أبو سنان said...

I am with Trev. When people get married it is best to refrain from children for a few years. You need to get to know each other and you also need to give time to make sure things are going to work out. "Staying together for the kids" is a lie.

I also think that there are people, who based on their knowledge of themselves, probably should not have children.

I have known people who it is clear do not have the patience or understanding to have children, yet they do so anyway.

Not only is the parent then miserable, the children live a rather harsh life.

I would crtainly respect a person who just admits that, for whatever reason, they do not want children, rather than having children and treating them badly.

Aysha said...

أبو سنان ,
I agree...